Archive for July, 2012


I am not a foodie. I eat because I have to. So to live to plan to eat is difficult for me. I try to inspire myself to “be a cook”. I watch Jamie Oliver’s Thirty Minutes where cooking does not need to take up a quarter of your waking hours. But I am left reaching for a bread roll with a banana squashed inside to satisfy my growling stomach.

I have read books about French cooking but it is the wonderful adjectives and words that satisfy me and not the food itself.

I like simple food. I really like bread. Good bread – normally the home made type that is doughy and springy with a slightly crisp crust but soft inside. I like it warmed with melted butter and nothing else added. I am surprised that I do not have a bloated stomach but I do not indulge. I have learnt the art of savouring a little, enjoying the small things – like one cube of chocolate which melts slowly in the mouth. Let’s say, I know what it is like to cram a whole loaf of bread into my stomach but that is another subject. Now, I am a savourer of little things.

John 6:33 For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

Surely this passage cannot be referring to that wonderful dough that I was previously talking about.

John 6:35 Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.

What a wonderful statement! But what does it mean?

Okay, so I know Jesus. I did go to Him and accept Him. Sometimes my stomach still growls when I am hungry. But I know that he is not talking about my physical stomach when he says “Whoever comes to me will never go hungry.” Before I knew Jesus, there was an emptiness inside of me. Something missing. At the time I did not know what it was. I just felt lonesome and as a result a depression sunk in. I was hungry for something. I guess others thought I needed a boyfriend. I did have a boyfriend. But he was not the answer. I know. I cared for him deeply and we used to write incredibly thoughtful, deep letters to one another. Through time I realised that he too was searching for something and he referred me to a book by Erich Fromm “The Art of Loving”. And then I realised. I did not read the whole book but saw within it references to the love of God. I had been to church all my childhood years and stopped when I started my studies. I didn’t even think about it. Why didn’t I think about it? Because I didn’t know God. But I had heard of Him of course. I had heard that He was loving and kind and good and true. It registered at the time that I wanted to know Him. And a deep hunger to know him was instilled (as if by God himself). A hunger that went beyond the traditions I grew up with. A hunger that would grow if I did not take steps to change my life and make Him and not I the centre of all that I am and all that I want to be.

Since then, my life has changed. I am not the person I was. That hunger that I experienced is not so raging. It comes back, reminding me that I have not pressed into the God of my life; when I have not spent time with Him and have not placed before Him all that I am.

Jesus is the “bread that sustains the heart.”


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Starry Night

From: http://www.houzz.com/photos/466147/Winter-Teal-Christmas-Sky-by-Raceytay-modern-artwork

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From: http://www.houzz.com/photos/336395/Starry-String-Lights-modern-holiday-decorations


There is something about these beautiful gold sparking beauties that brightens my soul. I am thinking of our little girl’s bedroom. Her name is to be revealed since she is only 21 weeks old and still in the womb. To me, she is already a little light.

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